Deep Forgiveness – Step 1
This is John Culbertson from MysticJohnCulbertson.com and this is your mini spiritual lesson for September 25th, 2018.
Our topic this week is forgiveness.
Today’s forgiveness tip: Tell Your Story and Feel the Emotions
There is a process that is involved in forgiveness. To say you have forgiven someone, yet you haven’t completed the work is to not forgive at all. Rather, it’s simply stuffing the emotions and trying to pretend they don’t exist. This ultimately will do more harm than good. Harm psychologically, emotionally, mentally, and even spiritually.
This step by step process is sequential and should be completed as such. Don’t skip steps and take your time to complete each fully.
The very first step in the process of forgiveness is to find someone that you can tell your story to and who will allow you to truly feel the emotions that are connected to that story.
This story should be from your point of view. You should not try to sugar coat what happened, be sensitive to what others will think or feel, or try to make the circumstances or events less than what they felt to you.
A good friend, a spouse, a minister, a counselor – these are but some of the possible people you can tell your story to. The key is to make sure that whoever you tell your story to that they are truly able to listen without judging and they are able to be with you as you ride the emotions.
Emotions that may come out as you tell your story include hate, disgust, guilt, embarrassment, fear, anger, hurt and pain, and so many others. Whoever is listening to the story must be in a place where they can handle the raw emotions without judgment.
Please note, forgiveness work is not for the faint of heart. It is intense, often times painful, and many times transforms the core of who you are as a person.
If you are having trouble speaking your story, I strongly advise to write the story out and then find someone you can read the story to. Writing the story out in and of itself will not engage in the process. Verbalizing the story is what must eventually occur. Until one can verbalize what has happened to them and to be vulnerable and feel deeply the emotions connect to what has occurred, they will many times be unable to reach the deepest state of forgiveness.
If you are someone chosen to listen to the story and you know that the person is working on forgiveness – your job is simple – to listen. To be present and sensitive to what has occurred in this person’s life. Compassion and empathy are key. You are not to attempt to fix what has happened – rather you are to be a companion as they take you through their emotional journey. No matter the emotions, allow them to be released and allow them to feel safe doing so.
Our prayer for this week is as follows:
I am forgiveness, now and always. I know God is forgiving and I know that God and I are one. I feel the power of forgiveness flowing through me and all around me. I feel myself going deeper and deeper into my emotions and accepting them as they are. I feel myself releasing old hurt, pain, and anger. I feel myself accepting that I am not wrong to feel the way I feel. I feel myself rejoicing in the fact I am overcoming any and all hurts from the past. I know forgiveness is for me and not for another. While I shall not allow myself to be hurt again, I can accept that my soul has grown through my life experiences and as such I’ve no need to hold onto the person, event, or circumstances that have damaged me so. I release this now and as I do I say: So it is, so it is, so it is. I believe. So it is.