There is nothing more devastating than the loss of a loved one. It can be especially difficult when that loss is unexpected and we don’t have the chance to prepare or say goodbye. Feelings of lost opportunity, regret and overwhelming sadness are natural, and we shouldn’t hide from these emotions. We know that our lost loved ones would want us to move on, and there comes a point when we have to allow ourselves to heal.
Living Through Loss
Although it’s natural to want to isolate yourself to mourn a loss, it’s the most important time to reach out for connection. Others have suffered as we suffer, and they are suffering as we are suffering. By reaching out, we can not only heal ourselves but also help others heal as well. This mental health expert recommends, “let other people into your grief. It may not be pretty, but allowing others to step in and help can be cathartic to both of you. Sometimes people don’t know what to do to help you, but try your best to accept their help.” Reaching out to a spiritual healer can help you restore your balance and transform negative energy into compassion and equanimity.
Learning How to Forgive
Forgiveness and moving on are lessons we all have to learn at one point or another. When someone is taken from us, especially at the negligent hands of another, it can feel hard to forgive. This wrongful death consultant explains, “when a loved one passes away, it is an emotional, difficult time for those close to them. Not only does a family have to deal with the loss, but they also often have to deal with all of the additional duties and responsibilities that come along with that loss. If a loved one died as a result of someone else’s actions, it can be particularly difficult to deal with all of these factors in the aftermath.” This can make moving on from the death of a loved one particularly difficult and could leave spiritually minded people feeling deeply imbalanced. Our anger is often wrapped up in our own feelings of guilt. The first step in forgiving others is acknowledging our own feelings of culpability, recognizing our own faults and forgiving ourselves for our failings. Forgiveness starts at the center and moves outward.
Remembering with Joy
Losing a loved one can feel like losing part of ourselves. We often define ourselves according to our relationships with the people in our lives. As we begin to heal from our loss, we begin to see that just because our loved one has passed, it doesn’t mean our relationship is over. Like a favorite book that has new meaning each time we read it, we can continue to learn from the memories of our loved ones and continue to call on them as a source of strength and wisdom. This wellbeing and personal guidance specialist recommends doing activities that bring people together surrounding those who have been lost. Put photos and stories in a cloud folder or document so that people can upload their own photos and memories and everyone can feel more connected in this trying time.
Recovering from a loss isn’t about leaving our memories of our lost loved ones behind. It’s about integrating our pain into ourselves in a way that lets us move forward. It’s about remembering the many ways our lives were blessed by their presence as well as the lessons they taught us that continue to make us into stronger people who are more open to everything that life has to offer.